just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
My vagina is officially offended.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize