It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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