walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
