How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
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