i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Randomize
