She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
