I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
