I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
