ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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