Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
