he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
