weddingsv make me drug and hornr
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
