you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
How external is "for external use only"?
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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