If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
Randomize