Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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