he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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