I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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