4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
