Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
