at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
