I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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