even my farts smell like vagina
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
How does it feel to date your dad?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
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