any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize