you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Randomize
