where am i from again
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
I will be naked everywhere
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Randomize
