I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize