oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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