That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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