Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
