Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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