Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize