i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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