I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
he was CRYING into my vagina
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
do nipples grow back?
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