She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
