would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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