Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
