I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
