shes about as inviting as chlamydia
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
