just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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