Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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