Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
Randomize
