I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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