I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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