i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
