You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
