Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
