i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
