So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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