I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
