Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize
