i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
Randomize