We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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